You ever look in the mirror and think, “Who the hell is she?”
Not in a “Blimey, who stole my collagen?” way—although, yes, gravity does have a cruel sense of humour—but in that soul-level sense. That disorienting moment where you realise somewhere along the way, you stopped being you.
Not in a “Blimey, who stole my collagen?” way—although, yes, gravity does have a cruel sense of humour—but in that soul-level sense. That disorienting moment where you realise somewhere along the way, you stopped being you.
You became:
The mum.
The wife.
The manager.
The caregiver.
The peacekeeper, the organiser, the one who remembers everyone’s birthdays—including the dog’s.
The wife.
The manager.
The caregiver.
The peacekeeper, the organiser, the one who remembers everyone’s birthdays—including the dog’s.
And you did it brilliantly, by the way. But now… it’s quiet. The kids don’t need you quite the same way. The career isn’t lighting you up like it once did. And your body’s sending you strongly worded memos in the form of hot flushes and 3am anxiety wake-ups.
And suddenly you realise: you’ve spent so long holding everyone else together, you never noticed you were unravelling.
🔍 Where Did You Go?
This is such a common thing I hear from women I coach:
“I don’t know who I am anymore.”
And what they really mean is: I’ve forgotten how to be just me.
“I don’t know who I am anymore.”
And what they really mean is: I’ve forgotten how to be just me.
Because being “just you” doesn’t feel like enough when you’ve been measured by what you do for others your whole life.
But let me tell you something important, love:
You’re still in there.
Under the sensible cardigans and the carefully juggled schedules is a woman who once danced in the kitchen to George Michael, who dreamed of writing a book, or opening a flower shop, or learning Spanish just because.
You’re still in there.
Under the sensible cardigans and the carefully juggled schedules is a woman who once danced in the kitchen to George Michael, who dreamed of writing a book, or opening a flower shop, or learning Spanish just because.
She’s not gone. She’s just buried under decades of “shoulds.”
🧭 The Mid-Life Awakening (Not a Crisis, Thank You Very Much)
You’re not broken. You’re awakening. And no, it’s not always glamorous.
Rediscovery looks like sitting in silence for five minutes and noticing what thoughts come up when nobody’s asking you for anything.
It looks like crying in the car park because you can’t remember what you like doing for fun anymore.
It looks like Googling “life coach for women over 50” at 2am with a cuppa in one hand and a Hobnob in the other.
And you know what? That’s more than OK. That’s the start of something beautiful.
✨ You Get to Choose Who You Want to Be Next
This chapter of your life isn’t about going backwards. You don’t need to become the woman you used to be. That was her season. This is yours.
This time, you get to do it on your terms.
- You get to say no.
- You get to put your needs first without guilt.
- You get to explore, play, experiment, and mess up without the whole world falling apart.
You get to matter again.
❤️ One Last Thing…
If this blog felt like a bit of a gut punch (in the best kind of way), then maybe you’re ready to take the next step.
This is the kind of work I love doing with women—helping you remember who you are, what you want, and how to actually go for it (without burning out or biting someone’s head off in the process).
Let’s have a chat.
No pressure, no fluff. Just a warm, honest conversation about where you are—and where you’d like to go.
No pressure, no fluff. Just a warm, honest conversation about where you are—and where you’d like to go.
Because love, you deserve to feel like you again.
Book a FREE coaching discovery call with me today HERE
Divorce is a seismic life shift. One minute, you’re managing work, family, and your daily to-do list, and the next, you’re navigating a sea of emotions, financial worries, and an identity crisis you never signed up for. It’s exhausting, overwhelming, and at times, utterly isolating. But here’s the truth: you are not alone, and you can come out stronger, wiser, and more confident than ever. Let’s break down the biggest challenges and, more importantly, how to tackle them head-on.
1. Overwhelmed & Exhausted
Between work deadlines, family responsibilities, and the emotional toll of divorce, it’s no wonder you feel like you’re running on fumes. The constant juggling act can leave you feeling stretched too thin.
How to overcome it:
- Prioritise ruthlessly – Not everything needs your immediate attention. Create a simple, manageable to-do list each day.
- Ask for help – Whether from friends, family, or a therapist, you don’t have to do it all alone.
- Self-care isn’t selfish – A walk in nature, a quiet cup of tea, or even a good book can do wonders for recharging your batteries.
2. Lonely & Isolated
Divorce can be a social minefield. Mutual friends may drift, and you might feel like you don’t fit in anywhere anymore. The loneliness can be deafening.
How to overcome it:
- Reconnect with old friends – Reach out to people you lost touch with. Chances are, they’d love to hear from you.
- Find new circles – Join a hobby group, take up a new class, or even try an online community for women in mid-life transitions.
- Travel solo – If you can, book a short getaway to somewhere new. It’s empowering and refreshing.
3. Loss of Identity & Confidence
Who are you outside of being a wife, mother, or partner? When those roles shift, it’s easy to feel like you’ve lost yourself.
How to overcome it:
- Explore new interests – Always wanted to paint, dance, or write? Now’s the time to try.
- Dress for confidence – A wardrobe refresh can lift your spirits and remind you of your unique style.
- Affirm your worth daily – Stand in front of the mirror and remind yourself: I am enough. I am strong. I am still me.
4. Financial Anxiety
Money worries can be one of the scariest parts of starting over, especially if you relied on a joint income.
How to overcome it:
- Get financial advice – A financial planner can help you create a clear, realistic plan for your future.
- Budget smartly – Track your spending and focus on essentials while planning for treats, too.
- Consider new income streams – Freelancing, consulting, or even a side hustle can bring in extra income and boost your confidence.
5. Guilt & Self-Blame
The ‘what ifs’ and ‘if onlys’ can be relentless. But beating yourself up won’t change the past.
How to overcome it:
- Reframe your thinking – Instead of dwelling on mistakes, focus on what you’ve learned and how you can grow.
- Forgive yourself – You did the best you could with what you knew at the time.
- Write a letter – Express your feelings on paper—then tear it up. It’s a powerful way to release guilt.
6. Fear of the Future
The unknown can feel terrifying. Will you be alone forever? Will life ever feel stable again?
How to overcome it:
- Take small steps – You don’t have to have it all figured out today. Focus on what you can control now.
- Create a vision board – Visualising your future can help shift your mindset towards hope and excitement.
- Embrace the adventure – This is a new chapter. Who knows what wonderful opportunities await?
7. Anger & Resentment
Betrayal, unfairness, and unresolved pain can fuel resentment. Carrying it around only weighs you down.
How to overcome it:
- Allow yourself to feel – Suppressing emotions only makes them fester. Let yourself cry, scream, or write it all out.
- Practice forgiveness (for you, not them) – Forgiveness isn’t about excusing bad behaviour; it’s about freeing yourself from its grip.
- Channel anger into action – Exercise, volunteer work, or even redecorating your home can turn negative energy into positive change.
Celebrities Who Came Back Stronger
If you need inspiration, look no further than these women who transformed their lives post-divorce:
- Adele – She turned her heartbreak into the record-breaking album 30, proving that healing can be powerful.
- Elizabeth Hurley – After her split from Hugh Grant, she rebuilt her career and became a thriving businesswoman.
- Tina Turner – She left an abusive marriage and went on to become a music legend, showing that life can begin again at any age.
Final Thoughts
Divorce isn’t the end of your story; it’s the beginning of a new chapter. It’s a chance to rediscover yourself, rebuild your confidence, and create a life that’s truly yours. You are stronger than you know, and your best days are still ahead. 💖
If you need any help with beginning your new chapter in life. Please contact me..
Ah, mid-life. That delightful stage where you realise that the ‘anti-aging’ creams lied, your knees make noises they never used to, and you suddenly have a strong opinion on comfortable shoes. It’s also the time when many women start questioning their worth.
Careers plateau, kids (if you have them) fly the nest, relationships shift, and society seems to act as if we’ve passed our sell-by date. If there’s one thing that will keep you thriving rather than just surviving in mid-life and beyond, it’s self-esteem.
Self-esteem isn’t about strutting around like Beyoncé on a world tour (although, if you can, more power to you). It’s about how you see yourself, how you speak to yourself, and what you believe you deserve. And let’s be honest—many of us have spent years putting everyone else first, often at the expense of our own confidence.
By mid-life, it’s no wonder so many women feel stuck, overlooked, or, dare I say, invisible. But here’s the good news: self-esteem isn’t something you’re either born with or not. It’s something you can build, strengthen, and reclaim—starting now.
A solid sense of self-worth is essential for navigating career changes. Whether you're aiming for that well-deserved promotion, considering a career shift, or contemplating finally starting that business you've always dreamed about, self-esteem is your fuel. Without it, you may find yourself downplaying your experience, shying away from opportunities, or letting self-doubt do all the talking. But with it? You start recognising your value, owning your expertise, and refusing to be dismissed just because someone in HR thinks 50 is “too old to adapt” (spoiler alert: it isn’t).
Then there’s the impact of self-esteem on relationships. By the time we hit mid-life, we’ve (hopefully) stopped tolerating nonsense, whether it’s from friends, partners, or pushy family members who still think they can dictate our choices.
A strong sense of self-worth means you stop putting up with toxic dynamics and start surrounding yourself with people who actually deserve your time and energy. No more being the default emotional support system for energy-draining people who wouldn’t return the favour if you were on fire.
And let’s talk about the elephant in the room: aging. Society loves to make women feel like they lose value as they get older—especially once we stop being “youthful” (whatever that means). But honestly, who wants to go back to being 20 and insecure when you can be 50 and fabulous?
True confidence comes from knowing your worth beyond wrinkles, grey hairs, or how well you “keep up” with trends. When you value yourself, you stop worrying about whether the world finds you relevant and start living for you.
So, how do you rebuild your self-esteem if it’s taken a bit of a battering? Start small. Speak to yourself with kindness instead of criticism. Set boundaries that protect your peace. Prioritise your happiness without guilt. Invest in personal growth, whether it’s through coaching, reading, or finally saying “yes” to that thing you’ve been putting off. And above all, remind yourself daily that you are not “past your prime.” You are in your prime. The best years of your life aren’t behind you—they’re right here, waiting for you to step into them with confidence.
Because if there’s one thing you should never let go of in mid-life, it’s the belief that you are worthy—of happiness, of success, and of the life you truly want. Now, go forth and own it.
This week, I delved into Rabbi Zohar Atkins' thought-provoking newsletter, "What Is Called Thinking?" His recent exploration of Jorge Luis Borges' short story, "Funes the Memorious," particularly resonated with me.
The narrative portrays Ireneo Funes, a man afflicted with perfect memory, rendering him incapable of abstraction and generalisation. This condition leads to a profound paradox: while memory is essential, the ability to forget is equally vital for cognitive and personal well-being.
Reflecting on this, I see clear parallels in leadership and personal development. Leaders often accumulate vast experiences and knowledge, but clinging to outdated information or past failures can hinder progress. Embracing 'intentional forgetting' allows leaders to discard obsolete paradigms, fostering adaptability and innovation. As highlighted in an article from Frontiers in Psychology, forgetting is not a malfunction but an adaptive function to suppress information that is no longer relevant.
Moreover, the concept of 'responsible forgetting' suggests that by intentionally letting go of less important information, we enhance our capacity to remember what truly matters. This selective memory is crucial for leaders aiming to maintain strategic clarity and focus. A study discussed by the NeuroLeadership Institute found that participants who actively forgot inconsequential details were better at recalling essential information.
In essence, both Borges' literary work and contemporary research underscore the transformative power of selective forgetting. For leaders and individuals alike, the art of forgetting is not about neglecting the past but about discerning which memories serve our present and future goals. By doing so, we create space for innovation, resilience, and authentic connections.
(Thinking with Zohar Atkins- Stoa Meditation 2022)
Why Personal Development Coaching?
In the fast-paced world of business, staying ahead of the curve is crucial. For many businesswomen, especially those juggling multiple roles, the path to success can feel overwhelming. This is where coaching steps in as a transformative tool. It offers not just guidance, but a roadmap to achieving personal and professional goals. But why should you consider coaching, and what are the real benefits? Let’s explore how coaching can be a game-changer, particularly in enhancing sales, overcoming personal hurdles, and shifting mindsets.
Boosting Business Performance
One of the most immediate benefits of coaching is its impact on business performance. For businesswomen aiming to increase sales and drive growth, coaching provides tailored strategies that are both actionable and sustainable. Coaches work closely with clients to identify strengths, address weaknesses, and develop a plan that aligns with their unique business objectives. This bespoke approach ensures that every minute and penny invested yields significant returns.
Moreover, coaching is a cost-effective solution. Consider the expense of traditional training programs, which often lack the personalised touch that coaching offers. The one-on-one nature of coaching allows for immediate feedback and adjustments, making the learning process more efficient and effective. Investing in a coach can save time and money in the long run by reducing the trial-and-error phase of business growth.
The cost of not seeking help can be even greater. Without the insights and strategies provided by a coach, many businesswomen may find themselves stuck in a cycle of stagnation, unable to break through sales plateaus or reach their full potential. This stagnation not only affects the bottom line but can also lead to burnout and dissatisfaction, further hindering progress.
Navigating Personal Challenges
Coaching isn’t just about professional growth; it’s also a powerful tool for navigating personal challenges. Many women find themselves in relationships that no longer serve them, whether in their personal lives or in their professional networks. These relationships can be draining, both emotionally and mentally, and can hold them back from reaching their true potential.
A coach provides a safe and supportive environment to explore these issues, helping clients to gain clarity and take decisive action. The emotional cost of staying in an unfulfilling relationship can be immense, leading to feelings of frustration, low self-esteem, and even depression. Coaching helps women to recognise these patterns, set healthy boundaries, and move forward with confidence and purpose.
The journey of moving on from such relationships is not easy, but with the right support, it becomes manageable. Coaches offer practical tools and strategies to navigate this transition, ensuring that clients emerge stronger and more resilient. By addressing these personal challenges, women can free up emotional and mental energy, which can then be redirected towards achieving their goals.
Transforming Mindsets
At the heart of coaching is the power to transform mindsets. Negative beliefs can be a significant barrier to success, often rooted in past experiences or societal pressures. These beliefs can manifest as self-doubt, fear of failure, or a lack of confidence, all of which can hold women back from reaching their full potential.
Coaching helps to identify and challenge these negative beliefs, replacing them with empowering ones. Through techniques such as cognitive restructuring, visualisation, and goal setting, coaches guide clients towards a more positive and proactive mindset. This shift not only enhances personal well-being but also has a profound impact on professional performance.
Empowered with a new mindset, women are better equipped to take on challenges, seize opportunities, and drive meaningful change in their lives. The ripple effect of this transformation can be seen in all areas, from improved relationships to increased career success. The cost of not addressing these limiting beliefs can be significant, resulting in missed opportunities and unfulfilled potential.
The True Value of Coaching
In conclusion, coaching offers a comprehensive approach to personal and professional development. For businesswomen looking to boost sales, overcome personal challenges, and transform their mindsets, coaching provides the tools and support needed to achieve these goals. The investment in coaching is not just a financial one; it’s an investment in your future.
The cost of not seeking help from a coach can be far greater, leading to stagnation, unfulfilled potential, and emotional strain. By embracing coaching, women can unlock their true potential, drive meaningful change, and create a life that is both fulfilling and successful. So, why coaching? Because the benefits far outweigh the costs, and the journey towards growth and empowerment is one worth taking.
Contact meHERE for a FREE call.We can then talk about any issues you may have holding you back from achieving you goals. We will discuss how in just a few weeks you could be on the path to success in your business and personal life.
